你发觉到了吗？ 爱的感觉，总是在一开始觉得很甜蜜， 总觉得多一个人陪、多一个人帮你分担， 你终于不再孤单了，至少有一个人想着你、 恋着你，不论做什么事情， 只要能一起，就是好的 但是慢慢的，随着彼此的认识愈深， 你开始发现了对方的缺点， 于是问题一个接着一个发生， 你开始烦、累，甚至想要逃避。
有人说爱情就像在捡石头， 总想捡到一个适合自己的， 但是你又如何知道什么时候能够捡到呢？ 她适合你，那你又适合她吗?
一个人很努力的在沿路上想要找到那颗最美的石头,但规则是不许回头，只可以往前走。 人就很慎重很认真地在选。 捡起一颗美丽的石头，往前走，却又突然觉得“不，这不是最美的。前面的路一定还会有更好的”。于是继续往前走。 走了一段路，都没看见看得起眼的石头，人心里很后悔为什么刚才要贪心，但是已经不能回头了，只好硬着头皮往前走。 同样的事情一直发生着。 因为人自己根本不知道自己心里面想要的那颗石头是什么样子的。
其实，爱情就像磨石子一样， 或许刚捡到的时候，你不是那么的满意， 但是记住人是有弹性的， 很多事情是可以改变的， 只要你有心、有勇气， 与其到处去捡,还不如好好的将自己已经拥有的石头磨亮，你开始磨了吗？
很多人以为是因为感情淡了， 所以人才会变得懒惰。 错！ 其实是人先被惰性征服， 所以感情才会变淡的。
在某个聚餐的场合， 有人提议多吃点虾子对身体好， 这时候有个中年男人忽然说"十年前，当我老婆还是我的女朋友的时候， 她说要吃十只虾，我就剥二十只给她！ 现在，如果她要我帮她剥虾壳，开玩笑！我连帮她脱衣服都没兴趣了，还剥虾壳咧！" 听到了吗？明白了吗？

jay® copyrighted

It's my first time I shred my tears for the books.
It's the first time I feel the burden of exams.
It's the first time I called back home because I'm having difficulties facing this obstacle.
It's the first time I take seriously for getting a good marks.
It's the first time I slept 3~4 hours a day just to absorb as much knowledge as I can.
It's the first time I had instant noodle for all my meal because I don't have time to leave my study table.

I'm worried,
I'm depressed,
I'm anxious,

Once again I can't control my tears from flowing, thanks sis for the song, the video.

jay® copyrighted

Nalguvat unccraf, gur svefg crefba lbh tbaan frrx jbag or zr.
Nalguvat unccraf, gur svefg crefba lbh tbaan zrffntr jbag or zr.
Nalguvat unccraf, gur svefg crefba lbh tbaan guvax bs jbag or zr.

V nz wrnybhf jura lbh qrznaq sbe uvz, V nz wrnybhf jura lbh qrznaq sbe uvf ercyl. Ubj V jvfu gung V jvyy or gerngrq gur fnzr. Ohg whfg jub nz V gb qrznaq sebz lbh?

V nz fb rntre gb unir n srj pbairefngvba jvgu lbh. V nz fb rntre gb frr lbhe arj zrffntr va zl vaobk. Ohg whfg jub nz V gb qrznaq sebz lbh?

Creuncf V guvax gung V nz tbbq, ohg va snpg V pnag qb nalguvat sbe lbh. Ng yrnfg gurer jvyy or nabgure crefba gung pna qb orggre.

V xabj gung lbh qbag jnag gb uheg nalbar gung vf qrne gb lbh. V qb nccerpvngr vg. V ernyyl qbag jnagf gb tvir hc ba lbh, V pnag nssbeq gb ybfr lbh nalzber.

V xabj Vz zhpu qvfnqinagntrf gb or pbzcnerq jvgu. Ohg zl srryvat gbjneqf lbh vf gehr, vf erny. V zvtug arrq gb qb gubhfnaqf guvatf gb unir n yvggyr bs lbhe nggragvba. Naq lbh zvtug xrrc zr pybfr orpnhfr gurer fgvyy unir n yvggyr inyhr va zr. V jbhyq xabj gung lbh qbag unir n fvatyr srryvat gbjneqf zr. V nz n wbxr gb rira zragvba nobhg vg. Vz whfg orvat fb haarprffnel nebhaq lbh. Ubj V jvfu gung lbh jvyy gryy zr gung V nz jebat.

Rirelqnl, V pbzr gb bayvar, V fvta va fxcr, whfg ubcr gb frr gung lbh ner bayvar fb V pna fnl uv gb lbh.
Rirelgvzr V ybbx vagb zl cubar, whfg gb purpx jurgure lbh yrnir zr n zrffntr. Naq V xrrc nyy bs lbhe zrffntr va zl vaobk, fb gung V pna ernq vg jura V zvff lbh.
Rirelgvzr V jvyy nfx ubj unir lbh orra gbqnl. Orpnhfr V jnaan znxr fher gung lbh ner nyevtug. Vz shyy jvgu wbl naq unccvarff jura lbh ner gur bar jub zrffntr zr svefg.
Lbh jvyy nyjnlf erznva va zl zvaq, rira V arire unq lbh orsber. Lbh jvyy nyjnlf or.

V arrq lbh. Onol.


I ♥ u

jay® copyrighted

It is gonna summer break soon, really soon. There's people that is hoping so much to return to their mother earth Malaysia, yet they can't. There's people that don't really wants to go back, but they do. Of course I'm so wanting to go back. I miss my family, I miss my grandparents, I miss my relatives, I miss my friends, I miss those kids in the kindergarden (大树哥哥 is what they used to call me, I spent my winter break with those little monkey!) , I miss the food there. And I'm gonna prepare myself for the Humanitarian Mission. It is my first time to feel like doing something without a "her" as a purpose. Instead I started to put my family in the first place. People do learn when time grows. They decide to set aside what had been an obstacle in their life. They realize the thing that had been always supporting them all the time. A lot of unexpected stuff happens. It may be happy, as well as sad. Yet life still have to continue. It's time to quiet yourself, set everything aside for a moment, and think carefully, find carefully, deep inside your heart, your main purpose of being here in this world. Is it to eat alot alot of food? or study many many books? or having a sweet memorable relationships? I don't know, it's all about yourself.

People learn from own experience. They might learn from readings. They also can learn from other's mistakes. I guess I don't have the chance to put myself into that shoe, thus I ask around for answers. Miss P, you had enlighten me, I am glad that I was surrounded by people who can always reminds me of my purpose. "Go after the one who loves you, but not the one who you loves, they will treat u better. Choose the one who loves you most, but not the one who seek for better, they will give u the best." she told me.

You astonished me with what u said. You made me climb one step higher.

jay® copyrighted

从前有一对情侣，男朋友非常胆小，做什么危险的事都要女朋友先尝试。女朋友早就想分手，可心里总是放不下男朋友。一次，两人出海，返航时，飓风将小艇摧毁，幸亏女友抓住了一块木板才保住了两人的性命。女友问男友：“ 你怕吗？” 男友从怀中掏出一把水果刀，说：“ 怕，但有鲨鱼来，我就用这个对付它。” 女友只是摇头苦笑。不久，一艘货轮发现了他们，正当他们欣喜若狂时，一群鲨鱼出现了，女友大叫：“我们一起用力游，会没事的！” 男友却突然用力将女友推进海里，独立扒着木板朝货轮了,并喊道：“ 这次我先试！” 女友惊呆了，望着男友的背影，感到非常绝望。鲨鱼正在靠近，可对女友不感兴趣而径直向男友游去，男友被鲨鱼凶猛地撕咬着，他发疯似地向女友喊道：“ 我爱你！”
女友获救了，甲板上的人都在默哀，船长坐到女友身边说：“ 小姐,他是我见过最勇敢的人。 我们为他祈祷！” “不，他是个胆小鬼。” 女友冷冷地说。“ 您怎么这样说呢？刚才我一直用望远镜观察你们，我清楚地看到他把你推开后用刀子割破了自己的手腕。鲨鱼对血腥味很敏感，如果他不这样做来争取时间，恐怕你永远不会出现在这艘船上。”

True I don't like it when you started to talk bad and react such way to your leader, your senior. Did he have done anything that is out of morality or commit crimes? If the over caring of him annoyed you, you should have tell him what you have feel. Shutting the door pretending you are not in the room and giving a lot of lame excuses that involving other person is very childish.

Maybe when everyone is so look up to you, and being so close and nice to you had made u such a person. That you have forget the good and kind side of yourselves, I'm deeply sorry and pityful for that. You might think that you are the better one, or being a smart ass acting like you are clever. You might thought that you are treating your friend nice and sweet, but I would tell you that it's solely because they give's u benefits. As long as they pleased you. "Who would wants to make friends with some troublesome person and never make me happy?". Yeah you are just this kind of person. So day when you feel that they don't provide you any more entertainment and don't do you any good, you'll treat them like a trash.

The clever one here is not only you. Being silence doesn't means that I don't know what you are trying to do and influence behind the scene. A fake cough you made, thought I never realize? I just don't wanna start an argument because you are always the one who is innocent. So nobody will get to scold you when actually you are the one who is suppose to learn.

You are just being so arrogant and disrespectful.



jay® copyrighted

Called in the morning, nobody answers.
Called in the afternoon, still getting ignored.
Called before go to bed, its engaged.

Called the next evening, she picked up.
Don't have much credit left for a foreign country call. I asked her to call me back.
I waited for 30 minutes still didn't receive the call I expected.
Went to reload, and I called again. She says her phone is expired too. So we on skype.

We are on the webcam. She is so happy to see me, so am I.
We have some common chat, as usual.
Suddenly she cried.
I get curious. And I asked.
"Everytime you ask me to call you back, I become very worried.". She said.

Yes mom. I knew, I was so immature, I did a lot of foolish things in the past.
I made a lot of trouble, and you have to wipe my ass.
You need to settle the trouble for me, and even need to cover the cases so that dad won't find out. Because you know that I will as good as go to hell if dad know about it. Yet in the end dad still knows. And the one who get scolded is you.

Mom, you have done so many things for me. You had sacrifice more than enough.
No matter how hard you hit me with the cane, with the hangar, with your hand. I don't have any reasons to hate you. Every hit on me, is a pain in your heart.

Mom, I'm sorry for what I've done.
But this time I call you, I asked you to call me back,
Not because of anything unpleasant.
I just wanna wish you. Happy Mother's Day.


jay® copyrighted

Everyone is the prince and princes for the night~

It's MASSAD (Malaysian Student Annual Dinner) everybody is talking and waiting about! It is a dinner for our respectful 6th year senior who is going to graduate soon. As a gratitude and acknowledgement, for surviving the hardness-ship as a medical student here in Moscow, Russia. Some foreign country that we are not familiar with, with an absolutely different language, and culture that we have to adopt. Also for them that had guide the clueless juniors all way long, helps them in the difficulties in all aspects. As tradition, 2nd year will be the organizer for every year's MASSAD.



The dining hall is just so amazing, and breath-taking. Can really feel myself in Paris even though I'm in Moscow now. It is really creative for the indoor design. Everything is just too nice to describe with.



Everyone was well prepared for the day. Trying so hard to make themselves as pretty and handsome as they can. As if it is their wedding day. Layers of make ups on the face. Layers of coats was put on. But u are gonna admit it that everybody looks so awesome!


It is not pretending! I played a song!
Glad that was arranged to an earlier bus. So I got a chance to walk around the hotel. Explored and found out the room for VIP. And there actually have a piano. Can't resist myself to lay my finger on that so cool white musical instrument. Ah, how I wish I had one in my room now.


Billy, a great leader of mine. No small deal.


Left: Kugan(formal MASSAD president 2011)
Right: Chung Ti(current MASSAD vice-president 2012.. =P)




This is what really matters. It's my dance team for the MASSAD! Hell yeah we prepared so hard for the last few month. Just for today. I'm not gonna mention how we went through the trainings, but the real performance went just so perfect, everybody cheer and shouted their throat out. We are sweating, and we are happy!


Left: JUO Foxtrot
Middle: SUO Bravo
Get to unite with seniors back in RMC. Gosh, reminds me of how they ragged us last time. Ordered us to crawl around the basketball court, doing some forward roll until we vomit our lunch out. It was so damn suffering during the time, but it is so funny and memorable when recall it. Miss the day SIR!


Alrite! Who wanna have a lift? =D

A big thank you for the MASSAD committee that had bring it to real. Also you guys for those came and supported MASSAD all the way. Though it was not a perfect night, we must thank those who worked night and day behind the scenes.

The day would be better if you had come. Sorry for not inviting earlier.

jay® copyrighted

独乐乐不如众乐乐

两个分担一个苦难，

则只有半个苦难，

欢喜的承担。

两个分享一份快乐，

则拥有两份快乐，

愉悦的投入。

让我们分担与分享，

就这样让数目失去了平衡，

让我们分担与分享，

让对立失去了比量。

独乐乐不如众乐乐，

我为人人人人为我，

花朵蓝天都充满了喜乐。

人的一生，就像从一粒小小的种子，慢慢的发芽，成长。慢慢的，变成了一棵茁壮的大树。

不管怎么样，你还是得成长。你并没有选择可以永远是个小宝宝。可是，想要变成一棵怎么样的树，全靠自己。

一棵灿烂，健康的大树，当然会迎来好多好多，五颜六色的小鸟。也会引来人们在大树下乘凉。动物也来嬉戏。

难道你想做棵，我们常常可以在鬼戏看到。瘦瘦干干，叶子也没有一片的树吗？在上面，也只有乌鸦在等待着余剩的尸体。只有野狼在后面准备扑击猎物。

当然！要变成怎么样的大树，自己来决定。

经过了多少的刮风暴雨，热晒雨淋，我们所过去的，并不容易。从中，我们也慢慢体会到，人的一生，是该如何走。

别因为一些小小的风吹雨打，而撑不住。要坚强的站上去！美好的未来，就在前面。

jay® copyrighted

Moscow Rain

It's the 1st time it rains FOR REAL in Moscow after half a year here. Even the Moscowrian themselves never expect it, I suppose. Everyone was hiding beneath магазины(shops). The sky is always seems so gloomy, grey all day long. But it just won't rain. I love that kind of weather. And it never depress me or affect my mood. Yet some people did. The touches of rain drops remind me, there's only 2 month left for Summer Break!
jay® copyrighted